The Law of Attraction is Bullshit
I'm not pulling any punches here. Learn why it's in your best interests to ditch the Law of Attraction.
In the past I’ve taught moon rituals focused on abundance and prosperity, which is a valid need many folks have, but there are a lot of ideologies that can and do get in the way around this kind of working, most notably the “law of attraction.” The law of attraction (heretofore referred to as LOA) shows up most prominently around money and finances, though I’ve seen this ideology applied to relationships and all other manner of life experiences. It’s also known as the “prosperity gospel” in some Christian circles.
The law of attraction in prosperity and abundance works bypasses the very real outside factors and barriers that individual people face, the things that are out of a person’s control. It’s a highly individualistic ideology that doesn’t account for reality of an interconnected world, with systems in place that affect people on every level. It actually gets in the way of successful abundance and prosperity workings because of this. For one thing, if you believe that it’s all up to you and your faith, then you’re going to miss key things you need to address in your circumstances in order to get what you want in magical works. But that’s beside the point.
The law of attraction is a popular ideology, with celebrity endorsements and all kinds of seminars that are built upon using the principle of the LOA to make your life more fulfilling in whatever capacity you feel you are lacking. There’s no shortage of “influencers” peddling this ideology. But this ideology is neither true, nor is it helpful.
Examining the Law of Attraction
It's said that if you want something and set the intention that you will have it, and visualize and work hard and make sure to think positively all the time, you will get that thing you want. In nature, like attracts like, they say.
When I was really little there was this stuffed animal raffle at an away basketball game that my sister participated in. I wanted this stuffed lion so bad. I visualized having it, I thought positively about it the whole game, I got my mom to enter me into the raffle, and waited as patiently as a little girl can for the raffle winners to be announced. And I was sure it was mine. Someone else won. Did I do something wrong? No.
You can work hard for something, believe in it, visualize it, and still not obtain it. This is experientially true.
The purpose of this post isn't to rationalize the reason you don't get what you want, so I won't go into that, but it's important to remember that we do not always get what we want regardless of what any guru or celebrity promises and regardless of how badly we want it.
The Law of Attraction Victim Blames
For a universal law to be a law it has to be true all the time. The LOA as it is popularly understood is, demonstrably, not true all the time. The law of attraction (popularly) states that if you focus on positive thinking, positive things will happen to you, and if you focus on negative thinking, negative things will happen to you. I'm about to be very blunt, so brace yourselves.
Did a crack baby not think positively enough in the womb? Did an abused child invite the abuser into their life? Did Jewish people invite the holocaust with negative thinking? Did women invite the patriarchy, did minorities invite racism?
Of course not.
In this context you can see how this philosophy is victim blaming, gaslighting, and atrocious. Conversely, how would a proponent of this butchered principle explain the good things that happen to chronically pessimistic people, or depressed people, or anxious people who spend all day focused on the worst possible outcomes?
I’ve heard folks say that you’ll subconsciously attract a toxic partner to “heal your deepest wounds.” This idea is both victim blaming and terribly simplistic. As if toxic people are up front about who they are, rather than masked, ensnaring, and predatory. The labeling of “toxic” itself is problematic because it’s too vague. I take it literally: toxic = risky, harmful, deadly, poisonous. Abusive. Going off of this definition, there is a big difference between someone accidentally hurting you/unintentionally bringing light to a deep wound (not a toxic person), and someone who is actively harmful toward you (a toxic person) reactivating that wounding.
The former will care about your feelings and want to be part of your healing. Even if they act out of an unhealed part of themselves, they’ll want to participate in healing. The latter will try to destroy you, will use your wounding to their advantage, and your healing will be in spite of them, not with them. They are not in your life to help you heal.
But most importantly: their actions are not your fault, and you did not somehow bring it upon yourself subconsciously or otherwise in any capacity. Read that last sentences as many times as it takes to sink in.
Removing what’s causing harm is often the first step in healing, which means the toxic person has to go. We can only address our deeper wounds and heal when there is safety. And that takes time and trust. I categorically reject the idea that more trauma is the spiritual pathway to healing, and I refuse to believe that any worthwhile Spirit friend would want that for us. In this context, it can be clearly seen that the LOA is an abuse apologist ideology.
How Victim-Blaming Keeps You Hooked into the Ideology
The blame cycle of the LOA exists to make sure that you don't question the validity of its claims. If you don't get what you want or if something awful happens to you, it’s your fault for not thinking positively enough, or it your fault for “subconsciously” making it happen. So you’ll blame yourself, feel guilty, feel like you aren’t good enough, rather than questioning whether or not this ideology actually serves you, or even who it serves.
LOA ideology really serves the people who are doing horrible things, because it absolves them of any responsibility. The abuser isn’t at fault because the abused “attracted” them. System oppression is never addressed because individuals and cultures of people “attracted these circumstances.” The oppressor is a dictator the oppressed set up themselves. This is what makes it such a dangerous rabbit hole. It prevents real, positive change. And it erodes compassion for others, to say that the harm they experience is their own fault, that they consciously or subconsciously bought it upon themselves.
The LOA is nefarious pseudo-spirituality and pseudo-metaphysics. It is the root of toxic love and light culture.
Positive Thinking vs The Law of Attraction
Positive thinking (or as I would like to consider it, having some measure of good faith in the ability to experience good things) for an individual is helpful because it is what leads to taking action. Taking action is what leads to changes and results. The faith bit is helpful because it's the basis of hope. Results are never guaranteed.
Ditch the shame game that is the LOA and work your will by actively committing to and going after what you want without the excess concern about whether or not you're thinking positively enough. Make the efforts in good faith and forget the outcome. Have confidence in yourself. And look to the bigger picture, look beyond yourself to your community, to the ecosystem, to the world at large and how working together with others toward a common, good goal will effect positive changes for everyone.
We can't control outcomes, but we can influence them. You don't need to believe in fake science or take on the baggage that comes with it. Believing in yourself, taking action, and accepting life for the crapshoot it is will get you much further with a lot less shame and oppressor-positive baggage than clinging to the false principles of the law of attraction will.
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This is a reprint of a post I wrote in 2019.
About the Author (me): My name is Jessica Jascha and I am a psychic, witch, herbalist, spirit worker and teacher in Minnesota. I also writes for Witch Way Magazine.
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Copyright Jessica Jascha 2024. All Rights Reserved.
I have the same experience with soul contracts or the idea that I have created a "contract" with everyone who comes into my life for the purpose of learning. If doesn't make sense to me. When someone is abusive, or even just not a person I want to be around, at what point have I learned enough to terminate that relationship? Does that mean I have a soul contract with someone who hurt me for the purpose of my spiritual development? Just doesn't align with my idea of spirit.